January 2011
December 2010
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The View makes me want to take my own life.
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The Frenemy.: The Asshole →
thefrenemy:
Something I say a lot: I am attracted to assholes.
What I really mean is: Out of all the people attracted to me, I choose the assholes.
What I should be saying is: “Sarcasm and likes to wear knit caps” should not be synonymous with “asshole.” LOOK HARDER.
Okay, so falling for ‘the nice…
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Is it that your dream is unattainable or is it that you had the wrong dream?
– BRB totally relating to Joaquin Phoenix in “I’m Still Here”.
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My video response to “yo girl I think u look real good puttin on that lipstick.”
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Is it just me or is December 26 the most...
The excitement from Christmas is over and if you are anything like me, you are probably just coming down from your high of Bad Decisions (eg: eating too much crap, drinking too much stuff that makes you feel like crap the next morning, drunk Facebooking people you haven’t even met in real life but have a massive crush on [you have to Facebook them because you don’t have their number in...
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To the person who Googled "fucking daddy's girl...
Wut up.
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It’s acceptable to start drinking before the dinner guests arrive and while I’m still cooking and while I still have wet hair from the shower, right?
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Where I get serious
90% of the time, this blog is full of posts that are written in jest. I rarely if ever take myself too seriously in real life and I want this blog to reflect that. I am my best self when I make light of things and am actively seeking to find the humor in all, if not most situations.
Today I started following Sady Doyle on both Twitter and here on Tumblr. After reading her posts about Keith...
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iwantinstantlunch asked: hi, this might sound weird but what would you do if someone ever called you boring?
iwantinstantlunch asked: hi, this might sound weird but what would you do if someone ever called you boring?
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Lazy Self-Indulgent Book Reviews: ON ONLY WRITING... →
lazybookreviews:
It’s fine, okay? LEAVE OUR WRITERS ALONE WITH YOUR EXPECTATIONS.
I think we have, as a nation, this sense that if you wrote a great novel, you should churn another one out at some point.
SO MUCH WRONG WITH THIS.
First up, we’re obsessed with this notion that hard work pays off. Well, it does if you’re building a bridge. And, of course, if you’re already writing a great...
You know you are drunk when The Hangover makes you...
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The Fighter made me feel some feelings
No other movie has elicited the same feelings in me as this movie. Keep in mind that I haven’t yet seen Black Swan, which I am sure will make me feel all the feelings in the world.
This movie is about family, basically. It’s about how you feel loyalty to the people who you have known the longest, even when those people might not have your best interest at heart. It’s a movie...
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My iPhone auto-capitalized Morgan Freeman, but not god. Conclude from that what you will.
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“Teresa, these are vulnerable moments.”
I never remember taking these things until the next day when I’m trying to take a picture of something and I realize that the camera is set to video.
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Things I plan on telling people I first meet in NY:
I know I’m from the West, but I can teach you how to dougie.
Things that happened last night
I bought some guy in dreadlocks a mai tai but not before A)giving him major shit for ordering a mai tai because no one orders a mai tai unless they are 1)a sorority girl which he clearly wasn’t I don’t care how drunk I was, or 2)already too drunk to care about quality taste, or 3)dumb, and B)asking to see his ID because I wasn’t convinced that he was even old enough to be in the...
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Him: You had to Google how to delete your cache?
Me: Listen, I only know the Internet, not computers okay.
wheresmymacandcheese:
cheia / fuckyeahkarenwalker / poisonparadise
Will & Grace: The Finale | 8x23
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Email I just got from my Grandfather right now
Hey you!
I am so proud of you. NYU. That’s outstanding and I’m sure the whole family is very proud of you. I’m not to sure how I’m going to deal with you on the east coast all alone!! We have family in New York and Baltimore and I will be in touch with them. Hope to see you before you leave for school. Sorry for responding so late.
Sometimes I wish the mailman could...
My love for Inside the Actors Studio and James Lipton is boundless, and since I’ve been up since 4am with no intention of going back to sleep, I thought I’d answer the famous Proust Questionnaire.
What is your favorite word? - I find myself saying “fly” a lot right now. As in “I am feeling fly as fuck.”
What is your least favorite word? - “No.”...
The girl who loves 30 Rock is never happy to hear the guy she’s dating loves Two and a Half Men.
Are you a bag of douche? →
Thanks, Doug.
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